Happiness(ˈhapēnəs) is letting someone make you the villain(ˈvilən)

By Derek Sivers

When I was making my record(ˈrekərd), I hired(hīr) a bassist(ˈbāsəst). But listening back to his tracks afterwards, I decided to play bass(bas,bās) myself instead. I’m glad I did, and love the results. But I hear he still hates me, 15 years later.

A writer in LA loved CD Baby, and kept insisting(inˈsist) I hire him as a consultant(kənˈsəltnt), clearly wanting the association(əˌsōsēˈāSHən). After his many requests and my many refusals(rəˈfyo͞ozəl), he threatened(ˈTHretn) to tell everyone CD Baby was a scam(skam) unless I hired him. I didn’t pay, so he’s been slamming(slam) me publicly(ˈpəblik(ə)lē) for years now.

Some ex-girlfriends(eks) and ex-colleagues(ˈkälˌēg) hate(hāt) me. Some people I’ve never met write pages on their blog about how much they hate me.

Funny thing is : I’m happy to be the villain they need.

Some people can only feel right by making someone else wrong.

I know I’m doing good helpful work. I’m so filled with love that nothing gets me down. So I guess if anyone should be the villain, it should be me!

It doesn’t bother me, and noticing it doesn’t bother me reminds me how happy I really am.

So, bring it on, anyone. Project your frustrations(frəˈstrāSHən) on to me. I’m happy to be that for whoever needs it.

https://sivers.org/villain

Social media

SOCIAL MEDIA

INT: AN OFFICE

Greta(gridə) has been cornered(ˈkôrnərd) by a coworker(kōˈwərkər,ˈkōˌwərkər) who is angry about being removed from Greta’s social media profile.

GRETA

Look, I’m sorry, Louisa(lo͝oēsə), it wasn’t personal(ˈpərsənəl) or anything. I’ve just started unfriending(ˌənˈfrend) people who aren’t strictly(ˈstrik(t)lē) relevant(ˈreləvənt) to my social life. Yikes(yīks), that sounded wrong and I can see the angry Tweet forming in your brain(brān), but come on, hear me out.

You and I are friends…in a professional context(ˈkänˌtekst). I like chatting with you here at the water cooler or at potlucks(ˈpätˈlək). I mean, I like being on your team when we do company bowling(ˈbōliNG), because you’re an awesome(ˈôsəm) bowler(ˈbōlər).

(Louisa does not look appeased(əˈpēz).)

Okay, I can see I’m doing a bad job at this. It’s just…you don’t really want to see my Facebook updates about going to nightclubs(ˈnītˌkləb) in the city and I’m tired of reading about marriage(ˈmarij) and pregnancies(ˈpregnənsē) and nightly family Boggle(ˈbägəl) sessions and life-changing trips to Europe.

Ugh(əɡ), not, not like your trip to Europe. Barcelona(ˌbärsəˈlōnə) looked absolutely magical. I meant it general. It’s like…

(Deep sigh.)

Do you ever feel like everyone’s living a better life than you? Or at least acting like it? From what I can tell, two-thirds of my friends have the most adventurous(adˈvenCHərəs,əd-), fulfilling careers(kəˈri(ə)r) that anyone could ever have. And the rest of them have perfect children and ideal(īˈdē(ə)l) spouses(spous). There’s some overlap in there too, which is really unbearable(ˌənˈbe(ə)rəbəl). Or, I don’t know, maybe they’re all faking(fāk) it. I guess I am too. I’m not posting about sitting under these fluorescent(flôrˈesənt,ˌflo͝o(ə)ˈresənt) lights fifty hours a week. Or going home to a cat now that James(jāmz) left for good. Or dressing(ˈdresiNG) a body pillow(ˈpilō) in his old clothes and sleeping with it.

(Stares(ste(ə)r) at the ground, Louisa completely forgotten.)

So anyway, that’s why I unfriended you. I just didn’t want to get too personal with my coworkers.

https://www.instantmonologues.com/preview/Social_Media

Cats know their names—why it’s harder for them than dogs

New research in Japan’s cat cafes(kaˈfā,kə-) reveals(rəˈvēl) our pet(pet) felines(ˈfēˌlīn) are more attuned(əˈt(y)o͞on) to us than we thought.

By Carrie(kari) Arnold

Cats know many things: how to catch mice, what the sound of the can opener means, and even how to take over the internet(ˈin(t)ərˌnet).

But the one question cat expert Atsuko Saito always gets is whether cats recognize their own names, an ability that’s well known in dogs.

In a new study in the journal Scientific(ˌsīənˈtifik) Reports, the psychologist(sīˈkäləjəst) at Tokyo’s(ˈtōkēˌō) Sophia University showed that they do know their names—even when called by a stranger.

Cats are Saito’s favorite animal, and after studying primate(ˈprīmət,ˈprīˌmāt) cognition(ˌkägˈniSHən) in graduate(ˈɡraj(ə)wət) school, she set her research sights on the oft(äft,ôft
)-misunderstood pets. (Is everything you think about cats wrong?)

“I love cats. They’re so cute(kyo͞ot) and so selfish. When they want to be touched, they’ll come by me, but when they want to be left alone, they’ll just leave,” she says, laughing.

Her past experiments have revealed cats can interpret(inˈtərprət) human gestures(ˈjesCHər) to find hidden food, recognize their owner’s voice, and beg for food from a person who looks at them and calls their name—all of which suggested that felines know their names.

…
https://www.nationalgeographic.com/animals/2019/04/cats-recognize-names-dogs-pets/

Focus(ˈfōkəs) as an Antidote(ˈan(t)iˌdōt) for Wanting to Do Everything

By Leo Babauta

I have a problem, and I think most people do as well: I want to do everything.

OK, not actually(ˈak(t)SH(o͞o)əlē) every single thing, but I want to do more than I possibly(ˈpäsəblē) can:

I want to do everything on my long to-do list, today
I want to take on every interesting project
I want to say yes to everyone else’s requests, even if I know I’m already too busy
I want to travel everywhere, and see everything that’s interesting
I want to try every delicious(dəˈliSHəs) food, and I always want more of it (and I always eat too much)
I want to watch every interesting TV show and film(film)
I want to read everything interesting online
I want to take on a lot of interesting hobbies(ˈhäbē) — each of which would take me many hours to master
I want to spend time with everyone I love, with every friend — and also have a lot of time for solitude(ˈsäləˌt(y)o͞od)!

Obviously(ˈäbvēəslē), this is all impossible. But I bet(bet) I’m not alone in constantly(ˈkänstəntlē) wanting all of this and more.

There’s a term for this in Buddhism(ˈbo͞odizəm, ˈbo͝odizəm) that sounds judgmental(ˌjəjˈmen(t)l) but it’s not: “greed(grēd).” The term “greed” in this context(ˈkänˌtekst) just describes the very human tendency(ˈtendənsē) to want more of what we want.

It’s why we’re overloaded with too many things to do, overly(ˈōvərlē) busy and overwhelmed. It’s why we’re constantly distracted, why we overeat and shop too much and get addicted(əˈdiktəd) to things. It’s why we have too much stuff, and are in debt(det).

Greed is so common(ˈkämən) that we don’t even notice it. It’s the foundation of our consumerist (kənˈso͞omərəst) society. It’s the ocean that we’re swimming in, so much a part of the fabric(ˈfabrik) of our lives that we can’t see that it’s there.

So what can we do about this tendency called greed? Is there an antidote?

There absolutely(ˌabsəˈlo͞otlē) is.

The traditional(trəˈdiSHənl) antidote to greed in Buddhism is generosity(ˌjenəˈräsədē). And while we will talk about the practice of generosity, the antidote I’d like to propose(prəˈpōz) you try is focus.

Focus is a form of simplicity(simˈplisədē). It’s letting go of everything that you might possibly want, to give complete focus to one important thing.

Imagine that you want to get 20 things done today. You are eager(ˈēgər) to rush through them all and get through your to-do list! But instead of indulging(inˈdəlj) in your greed tendency, you decide to simplify(ˈsimpləˌfī). You decide to focus.

…
https://zenhabits.net/focus-antidote/

Chevrolet(shavəlā): What Moves Us

Why we do what we do
There’s more to being an automotive(ˌôdəˈmōdiv) company than building cars, trucks(trək) and SUVs. To us, quality, safety and innovation(ˌinəˈvāSHən) are just as important as — and integral(ˈin(t)əɡrəl, inˈteɡrəl) parts of — every vehicle(ˈvēəkəl,ˈvēˌhikəl) that drives out of our plants. So, when you join the Chevrolet family, you’re really joining a 100-year-old practice of protection, caring for others and evolving technology.

Your peace-of-mind
The number one job of any car, truck or SUV is to get you where you need to go. We take this responsibility seriously(ˈsi(ə)rēəslē), engineering(ˌenjəˈni(ə)riNG) vehicles that are recognized(ˈrekigˌnīz,ˈrekə(g)ˌnīz) and awarded(əˈwôrd) for their quality, reliability(rəˌlīəˈbilədē) and dependability(dəˌpendəˈbilədē, dēˌpendəˈbilədē). And it’s all to help you feel confident(-fəˌdent,ˈkänfədənt) from point A to B and all the way to Z.

A better world
Caring about others makes the world a better place. And we care a lot — about supporting cancer research, honoring(ˈänər) those who serve, empowering youth and helping those who’ve faced disaster(dəˈzastər). Care to join us?

A smarter future
Innovation is what drives us forward. From available advanced(ədˈvanst) safety technologies to connectivity(kəˌnekˈtivitē,ˈkänəkˌtivitē) and infotainment(ˌinfōˈtānmənt) to vehicle electrification(əˌlektrəfəˈkāSH(ə)n), we’re working to make the road ahead smart, safe and efficient(əˈfiSHənt) so you can make the most of every mile(mīl).

A fresh perspective
Our lineup(ˈlīnˌəp) is full of surprises(sə(r)ˈprīz) — all of them pleasant(ˈplezənt). Just take a look at real people’s reactions to our vehicles. Whether the topic is dependability, design or capability, you’ll find Chevrolet has mastered the unexpected.

A truck that never quits
As the most dependable(dəˈpendəb(ə)l), longest lasting full-size pickup(ˈpikˌəp) on the road, Silverado(ˈsilvər) has as many stories to tell as it has miles on its odometer(ōˈdämədər).

https://www.chevrolet.com/about

Turning 40 and Looking Death in the Eye

By Michael David(ˈdāvid) Lukas(lo͝okəs)

I’m turning 40 this week, and I’m still not sure what to do about it. Originally(əˈrij(ə)nəlē), I wanted to have a big party, a bacchanalian(ˌbäkəˈnālēən, ˌbakəˈnālēən) blowout(ˈblōˌout) to celebrate(ˈseləˌbrāt) the official(əˈfiSHəl) end of my youth. But then I thought better(ˈbedər) of the idea. What I really wanted was a childless weekend with my wife away in the Napa(ˈnapə) Valley(ˈvalē). Even one night would be enough, so long as there was time for a soak(sōk), a meal(mēl), maybe a massage(-ˈsäj,məˈsäZH).

This was the plan until a few months ago when my wife was told she had colon(ˈkōlən) cancer and our weekend getaway in wine(wīn) country took a back seat(sēt) to everything else.

“We should still do something,” she said the other night at dinner(ˈdinər). “You only turn 40 once.”

At this, my older daughter, who is 3½(three and half), looked up from her noodles(ˈno͞odl).

“Does 40 mean you die?” she asked.

If she had asked this question a few months earlier, I probably wouldn’t have thought twice about saying, in the age-old way of parents, that Mommy and Daddy are going to be around for a long, long time. But given the circumstances(-stəns,ˈsərkəmˌstans), I felt(felt) as though I had to tell her the truth, or at least some approximation(əˌpräksəˈmāSHən) of it.

“No one knows when they’re going to die,” I said. Then, not wanting to scare(ske(ə)r) her too much, I added, “But we hope we’re going to be around for a long, long time.”

Actuarially(ˌak(t)SHəˈwerēəl) speaking, 40 is smack(smak)-dab(dab) in the middle of life. It’s the end of the beginning and the beginning of the end. Which is probably why the milestone(ˈmīlˌstōn) has so much resonance(ˈrezənəns). The classic(ˈklasik) midlife crisis(ˈkrīsis) — buying a sports car or a boat — may not be as prevalent(ˈprevələnt) as it once was. Still, it’s hard to pass by 40 without reflecting on one’s path through life.

…
https://www.nytimes.com/2019/03/23/opinion/sunday/turning-40-death.html

Germ(jərm)-Killing Brands Now Want to Sell You Germs

The world’s best-known antibacterial(ˌan(t)ēbakˈtirēəl, ˌanˌtībakˈtirēəl) labels are pouring(pôr) millions into probacterial(pro’baktēərēəl) health and beauty startups.

By Caroline(-lin,ˈkarəˌlīn) Winter

It was a snowy(ˈsnōē) week in February 2009 when David(ˈdāvid) Whitlock(wāt’läk) packed up his three-bedroom apartment near Cambridge(ˈkāmbrij), Mass.(mas), and moved into his van(van). Then 54 years old, the inventor(inˈven(t)ər) had spent all his money, almost half a million dollars, on worldwide patent(ˈpatnt) filings(ˈfīliNG) for a newfound obsession(əbˈseSHən): a type of bacteria(ˌbakˈtirēə), culled(kəl) from soil(soil) samples, that he theorized(ˈTHi(ə)rˌīz,ˈTHēəˌrīz) would improve skin disorders(disˈôrdər), hypertension(ˌhīpərˈtenSHən), and other health problems. “It was the most important thing I could work on,” Whitlock says. “But I knew I needed patents, otherwise I wouldn’t be able to get anyone interested.”

To make his white Dodge(däj) Grand(grand) Caravan(ˈkarəˌvan) habitable(ˈhabədəb(ə)l), Whitlock sawed(sô) down his queen-size bed frame(frām) and squeezed(skwēz) it in. He donated(dōˈnāt,ˈdōnāt) or abandoned(əˈbandənd) most of his furniture(ˈfərniCHər), storing(stôr) his lab equipment(əˈkwipmənt) in a barn(bärn) owned by his business partner, Walter “Hilly(ˈhilē)” Thompson. Then Whitlock drove(drōv) to his former employer(əmˈploiər), cement(səˈment) company Titan(ˈtītn) America LLC, where he still had an office and did some consulting(kənˈsəltiNG). Without asking permission(pərˈmiSHən), he pulled into the parking lot and made it home for the next four and a half years. “I found that if I stayed(stā) fully dressed and got inside two sleeping bags, I could tolerate(ˈtäləˌrāt) it,” he says of the coldest winter nights.

Every so often, he would coat himself in a concoction(kənˈkäkSHən) made with his homegrown bacteria, a ritual(ˈriCHo͞oəl) he’d begun years earlier in the belief it would improve his overall health and all but eliminate(əˈliməˌnāt) the need to bathe(bāT͟H) or use soap(sōp). Then he’d spend the day in his office, tirelessly(ˈtī(ə)rləslē) researching microbes(ˈmīˌkrōb). “A lot of people gave me shit(SHit) for living in my car,” Whitlock says. “But it was like nothing, trivial(ˈtrivēəl).” His real problem was finding investors, a challenge exacerbated(igˈzasərˌbāt) by his autism(ˈôˌtizəm) spectrum(ˈspektrəm) disorder. To get his message out, he relied(rəˈlī) mainly on Thompson. Most everyone dismissed the duo’s(ˈd(y)o͞o-ō) idea as nuts.

…
https://www.bloomberg.com/news/features/2019-04-22/even-clorox-and-unilever-want-the-booming-bacteria-business-to-thrive

Is Reality(rēˈalədē) Objective or Subjective?

By Steve Pavlina

The benefit(ˈbenəfit) of asking the big questions is that sometimes you can use reasoned(ˈrēzənd) logic to answer them. There are a few big questions that I’ve successfully answered to my satisfaction(ˌsadəsˈfakSH(ə)n), and I don’t expect my answers to change with the passage of time.

Is Reality Objective or Subjective?

One of those big questions is whether this reality is objective or subjective. I eventually(əˈven(t)SH(o͞o)əlē) understood that the answer is always going to be unknowable(ˌənˈnōəbəl) when asked from the perspective of a conscious(ˈkän(t)SHəs) being. Even if I die and remain(rəˈmān) conscious and aware in some form of afterlife, I still won’t know the answer. Even if I somehow live forever and become the most powerful and omnipotent(ämˈnipətənt) being imaginable(iˈmaj(ə)nəb(ə)l), I still won’t know.

The reason this question cannot ever be answered with a firm yes or no is rather simple. A subjective reality can simulate(ˈsimyəˌlāt) an objective one, and vice(vīs,ˈvīsē,ˈvīsə) versa(versə) So there’s no way to know if there’s another container(kənˈtānər) of the opposite(ˈäpəzət) type one level below your current reality.

If this container effect sounds unlikely, notice that you already experience it when you have a nighttime dream. During such a dream, you’re in a subjective world. Your dreamscape(ˈdrēmˌskāp) is supposedly(səˈpōzədlē) happening in your imagination.

If you believe that your waking world is objective, then your physical brain(brān) is doing the dreaming, so there’s an objective layer beneath(bəˈnēTH) your subjective dream world. Events(əˈvent) in that objective world could even interfere(ˌin(t)ərˈfir) with your dream, or they could influence(ˈinflo͝oəns) how the dream turns out. Something could happen to your physical body while you’re dreaming. Your dream world isn’t free and separate(ˈsep(ə)rət) from its objective container. Furthermore, the limitations(ˌliməˈtāSHən) of your physical brain constrain(kənˈstrān) the depths of your subjective dream world simulation(ˌsimyəˈlāSH(ə)n). Your dream world is running on physical hardware – the hardware of your brain and its billions of neurons(ˈn(y)o͝orän).

On the other hand, if you believe that your waking world is primarily(prīˈme(ə)rəlē) subjective, then you still don’t know if there’s another objective layer beneath that. Maybe your true nature is that of an objective being dreaming up a subjective story here. But even if you woke up to that reality at some point, such as when you die in this waking reality, you still won’t know if there’s yet another layer below that.

…
https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2017/10/is-reality-objective-or-subjective/

the instruction book?

analytic(ˌanəˈlidik) vs(versus.) generative(ˈjenərədiv, ˈjenəˌrādiv)

consider a game and its rule book:
how much interest do you have
in the ins and outs of the instructions
until you’ve watched it being played,
or played it a bit yourself?
there comes a time when the rules are interesting,
but not till the game itself captures you,

as teachers, we can forget early developmental(dəˌveləpˈmen(t)l) stages,
we can fall in love with the structures
that appear so clear to us now,
and we falsely(ˈfôlslē) imagine that taking apart the whole
would help the young create the whole anew(əˈn(y)o͞o),
the ascendancy(əˈsendənsē) of the analytic over the generative,

I watch kids and I seek to learn from them,
I sought to help a kid write a poem(pōm,ˈpōim,ˈpōəm),
and I inspired myself to write the poem instead,
ever since I have trusted the impulse(ˈimˌpəls)
to shape thought and feeling into coherence(kōˈhi(ə)rəns)
as the prime(prīm) directive,
to bring forth a whole
that wants to be born
if we can but release(rəˈlēs)
ourselves into the shaping(SHāp),

I watch kids and I seek to learn from them,
for me, a kid should write poems first,
working on idea, on feeling, on memory,
on authenticity(ˌôTHenˈtisədē),
and then figurative(ˈfiɡyərədiv) language can be tools
to capture meaning even better,
not as words and technique to learn first,
for then a poem is made of Legos(ˈlegō) without a story
to bind them into the magic of meaning,

my grandson knows how to construct things
into a whole with a story,
of such is the challenge of an educator(ˈejəˌkādər):
to learn by being, and doing,
to be of the whole that only later knows the parts.

By Henry H. Walker

https://henryspoetry.blogspot.com/2019/04/the-instruction-book.html

The promise(ˈpräməs) and perils(ˈperəl) of synthetic(sinˈTHetik) biology(bīˈäləjē)

To understand them well, look to the past

By The Economist(əˈkänəməst)

For the past four billion years or so the only way for life on Earth to produce a sequence(ˈsēkwəns) of dna—a gene(jēn)—was by copying a sequence it already had to hand. Sometimes the gene would be damaged(ˈdamij) or scrambled(ˈskrambəl), the copying imperfect(imˈpərfəkt) or undertaken repeatedly(rəˈpēdədlē). From that raw material(məˈti(ə)rēəl) arose(əˈrōz) the glories(ˈglôrē) of natural selection. But beneath(bəˈnēTH) it all, gene begat(bəˈɡat) gene.

That is no longer true. Now genes can be written from scratch(skraCH) and edited(ˈedət) repeatedly, like text in a word processor. The ability to engineer(ˌenjəˈnir) living things which this provides represents(ˌreprəˈzent) a fundamental change in the way humans interact with the planet’s life. It permits the manufacture(ˌmanyəˈfakCHər) of all manner of things which used to be hard, even impossible, to make: pharmaceuticals(ˌfärməˈso͞odək(ə)l), fuels(ˈfyo͞oəl), fabrics(ˈfabrik), foods and fragrances(ˈfrāgrəns) can all be built molecule(ˈmäləˌkyo͞ol) by molecule. What cells do and what they can become is engineerable, too. Immune(iˈmyo͞on) cells can be told to follow doctors’ orders; stem(stem) cells better coaxed(kōks,kōˈaks,ˈkō-aks) to turn into new tissues(ˈtiSHo͞o); fertilised(ˈfərdlˌīz) eggs programmed to grow into creatures quite unlike their parents.

The earliest stages(stāj) of such “synthetic biology” are already changing many industrial(inˈdəstrēəl) processes, transforming medicine(ˈmedəsən) and beginning to reach into the consumer world (see Technology Quarterly(ˈkwôrdərlē)). Progress may be slow, but with the help of new tools and a big dollop(ˈdäləp) of machine learning, biological(ˌbīəˈläjək(ə)l) manufacturing(ˌmanyəˈfakCHər) could eventually(əˈven(t)SH(o͞o)əlē) yield(yēld) truly cornucopian(ˌkôrn(y)əˈkōpēə) technologies. Buildings may be grown from synthetic wood or coral(ˈkôrəl, ˈkärəl). Mammoths(ˈmaməTH) produced from engineered elephant(ˈeləfənt) cells may yet stride(strīd) across Siberia(sīˈbi(ə)rēə).

The scale(skāl) of the potential(pəˈten(t)SHəl) changes seems hard to imagine. But look back through history, and humanity’s((h)yo͞oˈmanədē) relations with the living world have seen three great transformations: the exploitation(ˌekˌsploiˈtāSH(ə)n) of fossil(ˈfäsəl) fuels(ˈfyo͞oəl), the globalisation(ˌɡlōbələˈzāSHən, ˌɡlōbəˌlīˈzāSHən) of the world’s ecosystems(ˈēkōˌsistəm) after the European(ˌyo͝orəˈpēən) conquest(ˈkänˌkwest) of the Americas, and the domestication(dəˌmestəˈkāSH(ə)n) of crops(kräp) and animals at the dawn of agriculture(ˈaɡrəˌkəlCHər). All brought prosperity(präˈsperədē) and progress, but with damaging side-effects. Synthetic biology promises similar transformation. To harness(ˈhärnəs) the promise and minimise(ˈminəˌmīz) the peril(ˈperəl), it pays to learn the lessons of the past.

…
https://www.economist.com/leaders/2019/04/04/the-promise-and-perils-of-synthetic-biology