It’s In Every One Of Us

By Cliff(klif) Richard(ˈriCHərd)

It’s in every one of us

To be wise

Find your heart

And open up both your eyes

We can all know every thing

Without ever knowing why

It’s in every one of us by and by

It’s in every one of us

To be wise

Find your heart

And open up both your eyes

We can all know every thing

Without ever knowing why

It’s in every one of us by and by

It’s in every one of us

I just remembered

It’s like I’ve been sleeping for years

I’m not awake as I can be

But my seeing’s better

I can see

I feel through the tears

I’m to the earth

I’ve been realizing that

I bought this ticket

And watching only half of the show

But there’s scenery(ˈsēn(ə)rē) and lights

And a cast of thousands

Who all know what I know

And it’s good that it’s so

It’s in every one of us

To be wise

Find your heart

And open up both your eyes

We can all know every thing

Without ever knowing why

It’s in every one of us by and by

It’s in every one of us by and by

https://y.qq.com/n/yqq/song/000dq57y1OnXkh.html

Why experts are annoying(əˈnoi-iNG)

By Derek Sivers

When someone becomes an expert at something, you know what else they become? Annoying.

At a restaurant, your designer(dəˈzīnər) friend complains about the font on the menu(ˈmenyo͞o), your musician friend complains about the background music, and your manager friend complains about the service. Why?

The problem is that their expertise(-ˈtēs,ˌekspərˈtēz) makes them annoyed. They’re trained to spot(spät) errors. They’re so aware(əˈwe(ə)r) of what’s wrong. Even worse, they know exactly how to fix it. They learned the techniques to make things great, so they’re angry when someone didn’t do the obvious(ˈäbvēəs) solution. They get so frustrated(ˈfrəˌstrādəd) that they can’t focus on their meal(mēl), because now they really want to fix the problem.

These things don’t bother the rest of us. We’re easier to please(plēz). Good is good enough.

…
https://sivers.org/exan

the sense(sens) of wonder(ˈwəndər)

the tune(t(y)o͞on), over the dark

By Henry H. Walker

I am a teacher,
rather, I am more an educator(ˈejəˌkātər),

I love to learn,
I love to fan the flame(flām) of question, of inquiry(ˈinkwərē, inˈkwī(ə)rē),
the flame of the drive to know how the world works,
to fan that flame both in the other and in myself,

I have loved to quest(kwest) for the wild(wīld) whale((h)wāl),
to listen to the stories geology(jēˈäləjē) tells with rock,
to the stories the forest lives both above and below,
to feel the close bond with the wolf(wo͝olf) and the bear(be(ə)r),
to remember the strong bond with the flower,

I love to know how much we crave(krāv) wonder:
the most spiritual and needed of the senses,
the way our individuality(ˌindəˌvijo͞oˈalədē) feels and realizes
the glory(ˈglôrē) just outside that makes us feel better,
that makes us be better,

we then can know our place,
that it is less than being the center of the universe,
that it is more than our partiality(ˌpärSHēˈalədē),
and is of the same tune life,
and then consciousness,
sings into the dark.

…
https://henryspoetry.blogspot.com/2020/01/the-sense-of-wonder.html

Three Theories(ˈTHirē) for Why You Have No Time

Better technology means higher expectations, and higher expectations create more work.

By Derek Thompson

One of the truisms(ˈtro͞oˌizəm) of modern life is that nobody has any time. Everybody is busy, burned out, swamped, overwhelmed. So let’s try a simple thought experiment. Imagine that you came into possession(pəˈzeSHən) of a magical new set of technologies that could automate(ˈôdəˌmāt) or expedite(ˈekspəˌdīt) every single part of your job.

What would you do with the extra time? Maybe you’d pick up a hobby(ˈhäbē), or have more children, or learn to luxuriate(ˌləɡˈZHo͝orēˌāt, ˌləkˈSHo͝orēˌāt) in the additional leisure(ˈleZHər,ˈlēZHər). But what if I told you that you wouldn’t do any of those things: You would just work the exact same amount of time as before.

I can’t prove this, because I don’t know you. What I do know is that something remarkably(rəˈmärkəblē) similar to my hypothetical(ˌhīpəˈTHedək(ə)l) happened in the U.S. economy in the 20th century—not in factories, or in modern offices. But inside American homes.

The household economy of cooking, cleaning, mending(ˈmendiNG), washing, and grocery(ˈgrōs(ə)rē) shopping has arguably(ˈärgyo͞oəblē) changed more in the past 100 years than the American factory or the modern office. And its evolution(ˌevəˈlo͞oSHən) tells an illuminating(iˈlo͞oməˌnāt) story about why, no matter what work we do, we never seem to have enough time. In the 20th century, labor(ˈlābər)-saving household technology improved dramatically(drəˈmadəklē), but no labor appears to have been saved.

Technologically(ˌteknəˈläjək(ə)lē), the typical(ˈtipikəl) American home of 1900 wasn’t so different from the typical home of 1500. Bereft(bəˈreft) of modern equipment(əˈkwipmənt), it had no electricity(əˌlekˈtrisədē). Although some rich families had indoor plumbing(ˈpləmiNG), most did not. Family members were responsible for ferrying(ˈferē) each drop of water in and out of the house.

The following decades brought a bevy(ˈbevē) of labor-saving appliances(əˈplīəns). Air conditioning and modern toilets(ˈtoilit), for starters. But also refrigerators(rəˈfrijəˌrādər) and freezers(ˈfrēzər), electric irons(ˈīərn), vacuum(-yəm,ˈvakˌyo͞o(ə)m) cleaners, and dishwashers(-ˌwäSH-,ˈdiSHˌwôSHər).

These machines worked miracles. Electric stoves(stōv) made food prep(prep) faster. Automatic washers and dryers cut the time needed to clean a load of clothes. Refrigerators meant that housewives and the help didn’t have to worry about buying fresh food every other day.

Each of these innovations(ˌinəˈvāSHən) could have saved hours of labor. But none of them did.

…
https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2019/12/why-you-never-have-time/603937/

Money and Success Goals Are Social, Not Personal

By Steve Pavlina

One of the biggest traps(traps) is life is trying to achieve goals that only you will care about, such as making money or achieving success in your career. Yes, those kinds of goals can still create some ripples(ˈripəl) for others, but if your intention is mostly about you and your personal gains(gān), I’d predict(prəˈdikt) a lot of stuckness and stagnation(staɡˈnāSH(ə)n) for you.

I fell(fel) into this trap as well. In my 20s I thought my goals were well-intentioned enough. I was trying to get my computer games business going, make some money, and have a nice life in the field of game development. I certainly wasn’t trying to hurt anyone. But I didn’t really care much about what happened beyond my immediate(iˈmēdēət) sphere(sfi(ə)r). That seemed logical at the time, but I realized later that it was an irrational(iˈraSHənl) approach(əˈprōCH).

When I thought about goals back then, they were personal goals. I set fitness goals and financial goals and relationship goals. I achieved some of them, but the money and success goals always eluded(ēˈlo͞od) me, even though at the time I made them a high priority.

What I didn’t realize back then was that money and business success goals are social goals, not personal goals. Do you see that?

Suppose you lived on an island by yourself. What sense does it make to set financial and business or career goals? There’s no economy(iˈkänəmē). There are no social constructs. Such goals are meaningless.

…
https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2020/01/money-and-success-goals-are-social-not-personal/

Do I need a good kitchen(ˈkiCHən) knife(nīf), or a great one?

By Margaret(ˈmärɡərət) Grisdale

Spurning(spərn) the popular jelly(ˈjelē) moulds(mōld) and canned(kand) soup casseroles(ˈkasəˌrōl) in the early 1970s, I borrowed a copy of Mediterranean(ˌmedətəˈrānēən) Food and read voraciously(vəˈrāSHəslē) about Elizabeth(əˈlizəbəTH) David’s(ˈdāvid) “honest cooking.”

So what if the required fresh fish, garden-picked herbs((h)ərb) and sun-soaked(sōkt) vegetables(ˈvejtəb(ə)l, ˈvəjədəb(ə)l) were in short supply in suburban(səˈbərbən) Toronto at the time? I learned that a good knife is an essential tool in this and all forms of cooking. Discretionary(disˈkreSHəˌnerē) spending money was as scarce(ske(ə)rs) as the Mediterranean(ˌmedətəˈrānēən) ingredients(iNG-,inˈgrēdēənt), but careful management of my grocery(ˈgrōs(ə)rē) budget(ˈbəjət) enabled the purchase (from the local hardware store) of a high-end German knife. Little did I realize that it would be in my hand almost daily for the next 50-odd(äd) years, and nearly impossible to abandon.

This knife has an eight-inch, finely(ˈfīnlē) serrated(səˈrātid,ˈserˌātid) blade(blād) and a brown wooden handle. I called it the “brown knife.” Whether a testament(ˈtestəmənt) to its flexibility or my determination to make it work, the knife carved(kärv), chopped(CHäp), boned(bōnd), peeled(pēl), sliced(slīs) – and more. Family and friends eventually overcame their terror(ˈterər) of the uses to which I put it.

As time passed, I became a little more affluent(əˈflo͞o-,ˈaflo͞oənt) and the equipment in my kitchen also increased. It never occurred(əˈkər) to me, however, to abandon(əˈbandən) my brown knife. That is, not until a visitor, whose culinary(ˈkyo͞olə-,ˈkələˌnerē) skills I respect, declared: “There isn’t a decent(ˈdēsənt) knife in this house!”

The shock(SHäk) was acute(əˈkyo͞ot). There I was, a reasonably(ˈrēz(ə)nəblē) sophisticated(səˈfistəˌkādəd) and experienced cook, working with a bread(bred) knife.

…
https://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/first-person/article-do-i-need-a-good-kitchen-knife-or-a-great-one/

A Guide to Managing Your Time When You’re Always Behind

By Leo Babauta

It seems to me that being behind on all the things you need to do has become (or perhaps always has been) a part of our basic human condition.

I don’t know anyone who feels they’re completely on top of things.

Most of the time, we feel behind — too many things to do in too little time. We’re stressed, overwhelmed, busy, procrastinating, distracted. This is never a fun feeling, and yet most of us feel it most of the time.

So what can we do? I think there’s not just one answer. If it were simple, we’d have solved it long ago. But there are a number of things we can try, and I’ve found them helpful.

We’ll talk about these one by one:

Make a list. Then focus on one thing at a time, in intentional containers.
Work mindfully with your procrastination and distraction. Practice with your fear, discomfort, uncertainty, and feeling of overwhelm.
Work with your attachment to doing everything. Let go.
Manage your energy. Learn to relax(rəˈlaks) and replenish(rəˈpleniSH).
Create flexible structure. Adjust over time.
Let go of self-judgment.

Don’t get overwhelmed! These are doable(ˈdo͞oəbəl) actions. Let’s dive(dīv) into them.

…
https://zenhabits.net/manage-time/

How to Make Yourself Work When You Just Don’t Want To

By Heidi Grant

There’s that project you’ve left on the backburner(ˈbakˌbərnər) – the one with the deadline that’s growing uncomfortably near. And there’s the client whose phone call you really should return – the one that does nothing but complain and eat up your valuable time. Wait, weren’t you going to try to go to the gym(jim) more often this year?

Can you imagine how much less guilt(gilt), stress, and frustration(frəˈstrāSHən) you would feel if you could somehow just make yourself do the things you don’t want to do when you are actually supposed to do them? Not to mention how much happier and more effective you would be?

The good news (and its very good news) is that you can get better about not putting things off, if you use the right strategy. Figuring out which strategy to use depends on why you are procrastinating in the first place:

Reason #1 You are putting something off because you are afraid(əˈfrād) you will screw(skro͞o) it up.

Solution: Adopt(əˈdäpt) a “prevention(prəˈven(t)SH(ə)n) focus.”

There are two ways to look at any task. You can do something because you see it as a way to end up better off than you are now – as an achievement or accomplishment. As in, if I complete this project successfully I will impress my boss, or if I work out regularly(ˈreɡyələrlē) I will look amazing. Psychologists(sīˈkäləjəst) call this a promotion(prəˈmōSHən) focus – and research shows that when you have one, you are motivated(ˈmōdəˌvāt) by the thought of making gains(gān), and work best when you feel eager(ˈēgər) and optimistic(ˌäptəˈmistik). Sounds good, doesn’t it? Well, if you are afraid you will screw up on the task in question, this is not the focus for you. Anxiety and doubt(dout) undermine promotion motivation, leaving you less likely to take any action at all.

…
https://hbr.org/2014/02/how-to-make-yourself-work-when-you-just-dont-want-to

How to Have Closer(ˈklōzər) Friendships (and Why You Need Them)

Even if you find it easy to make friends — and it’s not, for most people — getting truly(ˈtro͞olē) close to people is still difficult. Here’s how to make it easier.

By Emma Pattee(pəˈtā)

Like so many people, I grew up watching the TV show “Friends,” dreaming of the day I would be living a glamorous(ˈglamərəs) city life surrounded by a group of close friends. Over the years, I’ve made lots of friends: childhood friends, work friends, college friends, writer friends. I have friends who like to hike(hīk), and friends who like to chat over coffee(ˈkäfē,ˈkôfē) and friends who live far away but whom I talk to a few times a year.

But close friends? “Friends” level friends? The “I can tell you anything and count on you always” kind of friends? Not so much. A childhood friend and I had a falling-out, never to be repaired(rəˈper). Another close friend moved away.

In groups of adults, you often hear some form of this complaint(kəmˈplānt): It’s hard to make friends as an adult. And if, for whatever reason, you don’t stay connected to your childhood or college friends, you can end up in your 30s (or 40s, or 50s) knowing a lot of people, but being close to very few of them.

Do we even need close friendships?

When you’re overworked and overwhelmed, the motivation(ˌmōdəˈvāSH(ə)n) to have dinner with a friend versus turning on Netflix and eating pizza(ˈpētsə) with your spouse(spous, spouz) can be hard to summon(ˈsəmən). But the research is clear: Close friendships are necessary for optimal health and well-being.

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/11/20/smarter-living/how-to-have-closer-friendships.html

Time is personal. Your year changes when your life changes.

By Derek Sivers

A new day begins when I wake up, not at midnight. Midnight means nothing to me. It’s not a turning point. Nothing changes at that moment.

A new year begins when there’s a memorable(ˈmem(ə)rəbəl) change in my life. Not January(ˈjanyo͞oˌerē) 1st. Nothing changes on January 1st.

I can understand using moments like midnight and January 1st as coordinators(kōˈôrdənādər), so cultures and computers can agree on how to reference(ˈref(ə)rəns) time. But shouldn’t our personal markers and celebrations happen at personally meaningful times?

Your year really begins when you move to a new home, start school, quit(kwit) a job, have a big breakup, have a baby, quit a bad habit, start a new project, or whatever else. Those are the real memorable turning points — where one day is very different than the day before. Those are the meaningful markers of time. Those are your real new years.

This isn’t selfish(ˈselfiSH). You know your friends and family well enough to acknowledge these special days for them, too. The day that I most want to celebrate someone’s life has nothing to do with the calendar(ˈkaləndər) day that they were born.

…
https://sivers.org/mny