Beneath(bəˈnēTH) the Surface of Bruce Springsteen(ˈspriNGˌstēn)

For more than fifty years, he’s traveled deep into the heart of America. But with his new Netflix(i) special—a film of his intense(inˈtens), powerful one-man show on Broadway(ˈbrôdwā)—Bruce Springsteen reveals(riˈvēl) that his bravest(brāv) journey(ˈjərnē) has been wrestling(ˈres(ə)liNG) with his own mental(ˈmentl) health.

By Michael Haines(hins)

The first time I meet Bruce Springsteen is backstage at the Walter Kerr Theatre(ˈTHēədər) in New York, where he is in the homestretch(ˈhōmˈstreCH) of performing his one-man show, Springsteen on Broadway. It is a few weeks before I am supposed to sit with him for an interview, but his publicist(ˈpəbləsist) has asked me to come by before this performance so he can, I deduce(dəˈd(y)o͞os), check me out. I arrive(əˈrīv) at 7:00 and am directed to a small couch(kouCH) near the backstage bathroom(ˈbaTHˌro͞om). Finally, five minutes before curtain(ˈkərtn), I see, coming down the stairs(ste(ə)r) that lead to his dressing room, a pair of black work boots and black-legged(ˈleɡ(ə)d) jeans(jēnz). Springsteen ducks his head beneath(biˈnēTH) a low arch(ärCH) and walks toward me, extending his hand and saying, “I’m Bruce.” We shake hands, and then there is silence. He looks at me and I look at him, not sure what to say. At five-foot-ten, he’s taller(tôl) than you think he’ll be; somehow, he remains the runty(rənt)-scrawny(ˈskrônē) kid in the leather(ˈleT͟Hər) jacket(ˈjakit), possibly dwarfed(dwôrf) in our minds due to the years he spent leaning against Clarence(ˈklerəns) Clemons.

That evening, Springsteen is weeks from notching(näCH) his sixty-ninth birthday. And as we stand there, I find it impossible not to think that the journey he has undertaken in this decade of his life has been nothing short of miraculous(məˈrakyələs). He entered his sixties struggling to survive(sərˈvīv) a crippling(ˈkripəl) depression(diˈpreSHən), and now here he is approaching his seventies in triumph(ˈtrīəmf)—mostly thanks to the success of this powerful, intimate(ˈintəˌmāt) show, which is not a concert(ˈkänˌsərt) but an epic(ˈepik) dramatic(drəˈmatik) monologue(ˈmänlˌôg), punctuated(ˈpəNGkCHo͞oˌāt) with his songs. After a year of sold-out shows, he will close it out on December 15, the same night it will debut(dāˈbyo͞o) on Netflix as a film. He at last breaks the awkward(ˈôkwərd) silence by giving a small nod(näd) and saying to me—but more to himself, just as we all kind of say it to ourselves as we head out the door each day—“Well, I guess I better go to work.” And with that he ambles(ˈambəl) toward stage right.

…
https://www.esquire.com/entertainment/a25133821/bruce-springsteen-interview-netflix-broadway-2018/

Intrepid(inˈtrepid) Business Travelers Are Finding Another Way to the Airport: Bike(bīk)

By Amy(āmi) Zipkin

Travelers have a bunch of choices on how to get to the airport. They can drive and pay to park. They can take a taxi(ˈtaksē) or car service, or, perhaps, a bus or train. But whatever way they choose, travelers usually face delays(dəˈlā) in traffic(ˈtrafik) or as they arrive(əˈrīv) at the terminal(ˈtərmənl).

That’s where a new option comes in, at least at some airports: the bicycle(ˈbīsək(ə)l).

Conor Semler(sa), a transportation(ˌtranspərˈtāSHən) planner(ˈplanər) for a private(ˈprīvit) firm who lives in Somerville(ˈsəmərˌvil), Mass(mas)., north of Boston(ˈbôstən), rides(rīd) his bicycle to Boston Logan(ˈlōgən) International(ˌintərˈnaSHənl) Airport when he travels for work, about twice a month.

“I prefer not to be in a car,” he said.

He said the seven-mile(mīl) trip(trip) to the airport takes about 45 minutes compared with 25 minutes by car. And it has obstacles(ˈäbstəkəl), including rutted(rət) streets through an industrial(inˈdəstrēəl) area(ˈe(ə)rēə). If it snows, cycling(ˈsīk(ə)liNG) is out. And once, he said, he was flagged(flag) for a pat(pat)-down by airport security(siˈkyo͝oritē) after the initial(iˈniSHəl) scanner screening picked up an anomaly(əˈnäməlē) — perspiration(ˌpərspəˈrāSHən). Still, the trip and parking are free, and he has a choice of seven bike rack(rak) locations at the airport.

Other airports around the country have also become bicycle accessible, among them Baltimore(ˈbôlt(ə)mər,ˈbôltəˌmôr)-Washington(ˈwäSH-,ˈwôSHiNGtən) and the airports in San Diego(ˌsan dēˈāɡō) and Portland(ˈpôrtlənd), Ore(ôr). Of course, some airports were built far from residential(ˌrezəˈdenCHəl) neighborhoods(ˈnābərˌho͝od) or, like Newark(ˈn(y)o͞oˌärk) Liberty(ˈlibərtē) International Airport in New Jersey(ˈjərzē), are accessible only from highways that restrict(riˈstrikt) bicycles.

…
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/11/26/business/business-travel-airport-bike.html

Fear(fi(ə)r) of Success: What Will Happen if You Succeed(səkˈsēd)?

By Steve Pavlina

Sometimes you find yourself with a goal you think you should want to achieve, but you just don’t seem to be taking enough action to reach it. You aren’t really afraid(əˈfrād) of failure(ˈfālyər) or rejection, the path to the goal seems clear enough and might even be an interesting challenge, and occasionally(əˈkāZHənl-ē) you’ll make some progress. But most of the time you can’t seem to get into that flow state, and you’re not sure why. This often happens with long-term goals that require intermittent(ˌintərˈmitnt) action, like losing(lo͞oz) weight(wāt) or transitioning to start a new business and eventually quit(kwit) your job.

One question I’ve found helpful to ask in these situations is this: What will happen if you succeed(səkˈsēd)? Forget about what you hope will happen or what you fear might happen, but realistically(ˌrēəˈlistik(ə)lē) consider what probably(ˈpräbəblē) will happen. So you achieve your goal. Then what? What else will change?

I’m not talking about giving a 5-second cursory(ˈkərsərē) answer, like “If I lose the weight, then I’ll be thin(THin).” Set aside at least 15-30 minutes just to think about how your life will really change once you achieve your goal (with no TV, radio, or other distractions(disˈtrakSHən)). There are often unexpected side effects(əˈfekt) that you may not be aware of consciously, but subconsciously they can be enough to prevent you from taking committed(kəˈmitid) action. For example, if you lose a lot of weight, here are some possible side effects: people will notice and will comment(ˈkämˌent) about it, other people will ask you for diet(ˈdī-it) advice, you may feel you need to continue with a permanent(ˈpərmənənt) lifestyle change to maintain(mānˈtān) your new weight, you may need to buy new clothes(klō(T͟H)z), you may become more attractive(əˈtraktiv) to others and thereby attract more social encounters (wanted or unwanted), overweight friends might become jealous(ˈjeləs), your family may resist(riˈzist) your changes, you may feel stressed about whether you can keep the weight off, you may worry about the loss of certain favorite foods from your diet, and so on.

It’s rare(re(ə)r) that a goal is all roses(rōz). Success requires change, and change has both positive and negative(ˈnegətiv) consequences(ˈkänsikwəns). Often while people claim to want to succeed at something, the reality is that the negatives outweigh the positives for them. But one way to overcome this problem is to consciously think about what those negatives are, and then uproot(ˌəpˈro͞ot) them one by one. Uprooting a negative side effect could mean figuring out how to eliminate(iˈliməˌnāt) it completely(kəmˈplētlē), or it could mean just accepting(əkˈsept) it and learning to live with it.

…
https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2004/12/fear-of-success-what-will-happen-if-you-succeed/

Bad fences(fens) make better neighbours(ˈnābər)

By Lori-Ann Livingston(ˈliviNGstən)

On the day we moved into our 100-year-old house on a quiet(ˈkwīət), one-way street, we got a parking ticket. So did the movers. The neighbours across the street had called bylaw(ˈbīˌlô) enforcement(enˈfôrsmənt).

We had a toddler(ˈtädlər), a dog and some friends and family to help us with the move.

This is the second house we’ve owned in our city in southwest(ˌsouTHˈwest) Ontario(änˈte(ə)rēˌō). We’re close to downtown, parks, trails and we live in a pretty vibrant(ˈvībrənt) neighbourhood of heritage(ˈherədij) homes, young families and engaged(enˈgājd) people who activate(ˈaktəˌvāt) our streets.

It wasn’t always this way. When we moved in 11 years ago, an older neighbour who’d lived on the street for more than 20 years filled us in on the street’s sordid(ˈsôrdid) past. It used to be the red-light district(ˈdistrikt), he told us. Pimps(pimp) and prostitutes(ˈprästəˌt(y)o͞ot) openly(ˈōpənlē) did business and drugs(drəg) were also readily(ˈredl-ē) available(əˈvāləbəl). Some neighbours took matters into their own hands. In a concerted(kənˈsərtəd) effort(ˈefərt), residents(ˈrezəˌdent) on our street left notes on the johns’ car windows, let air out of their tires(tīr), called the police regularly(ˈreɡyələrlē) and broke windshield(ˈwin(d)ˌSHēld) wipers(ˈwīpər) on vehicles(ˈvēəkəl,ˈvēˌhikəl).

It worked. Our street gentrified(ˈjentrəˌfī). People like us moved in. Kids played soccer(ˈsäkər) and hockey(ˈhäkē) in the street instead.

We met the neighbours on the driveway side of our house pretty quickly. They were youngish(ˈyəNGiSH), like us, had a dog and liked to chat over a low fence between our properties(ˈpräpərtē). “We’ll replace the fence,” they said when we met the first time.

But I think the fence was a test. Are we going to be good neighbours, or even friends?

It turned out we were, and the fence never got replaced.

…
https://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/first-person/article-why-i-refuse-to-have-the-internet-in-my-home/

Empty nest syndrome(ˈsinˌdrōm) is hitting me twice as hard

By Ann Gibbon(ˈgibən)

It had been a Thanksgiving like so many others through the years. The table was adorned(əˈdôrn) with paper-turkey(ˈtərkē) decorations(ˌdekəˈrāSHən) the kids had made in grade(grād) school, Grandpa told bad jokes and we all overdid it on the pumpkin(ˈpəNGkən,ˈpəm(p)kən) pie(pī).

What made this year’s gathering(ˈgaT͟HəriNG) different, though, was that my kids were home for their first family gathering since starting university in September. As I cleared the table, listening to their excited(ikˈsītid) chatter(ˈCHatər) about dorm(dôrm) life, new friends and stimulating(ˈstimyəˌlātiNG) ideas, I felt a pull of sadness. In a few days, they’d be off again.

I’m a mom of twins, and their departure(dəˈpärCHər) from my day-to-day has hurled(hərl) me abruptly(əˈbrəptlē) from active(ˈaktiv) parent to empty nester in an emotional(iˈmōSHənəl) one-two punch. When they first left for university, the house became oddly(ˈädlē) quiet(ˈkwīət) for the first time in almost 18 years. When friends ask me how I am adjusting, I joke that the house has never been neater and I always know where my car is.

The truth is, I’ve been thrown off balance a bit. I’d been dreading(dred) their departure for college. It lurked(lərk) in my mind through the years, a tiny(ˈtīnē) black dot that grew larger as they got older, more independent and more prepared to start the next phase(fāz).

Raising(rāz) twins, particularly(pə(r)ˈtikyələrlē) in the intense(inˈtens) early years, was such a fog(fäg,fôg) of doing everything that needed doing, two times around, that I didn’t think much about that day they’d leave to be on their own. I was too busy.

From the moment we brought my son and daughter home from the hospital, placing their tiny, swaddled(ˈswädl) forms side by side in a single crib(krib), my husband and I muddled(ˈmədld) through the messy(ˈmesē), exhausting(igˈzôstiNG) and exhilarating(igˈziləˌrātiNG) terrain(təˈrān) of taking care of two babies at once.

…
https://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/first-person/article-empty-nest-syndrome-is-hitting-me-twice-as-hard/

Now Apps Can Track(trak) You Even After You Uninstall(ˌəninˈstôl) Them

New trackers make it easy for developers to identify(īˈdentəˌfī) fed-up users and pester(ˈpestər) them with targeted ads(ad).

By Gerrit(ja) De(də) Vynck(vyik)

If it seems as though the app you deleted(dəˈlēt) last week is suddenly(ˈsədn-lē) popping up everywhere, it may not be mere(mi(ə)r) coincidence(-ˌdens,kōˈinsədəns). Companies that cater(ˈkātər) to app makers have found ways to game both iOS and Android, enabling them to figure out which users have uninstalled a given piece(pēs) of software lately—and making it easy to pelt(pelt) the departed(dəˈpärdəd) with ads aimed at winning them back.

Adjust, AppsFlyer, MoEngage, Localytics(ˈlitik), and CleverTap are among the companies that offer uninstall trackers, usually as part of a broader set of developer(dəˈveləpər) tools. Their customers include T-Mobile US, Spotify Technology, and Yelp(yelp). (And Bloomberg Businessweek parent Bloomberg LP, which uses Localytics.) Critics(ˈkridik) say they’re a fresh reason to reassess(ˌrēəˈses) online privacy(ˈprīvəsē) rights and limit what companies can do with user data. “Most tech companies are not giving people nuanced(ˈn(y)o͞oˌäns) privacy choices, if they give them choices at all,” says Jeremy(jarəmi) Gillula, tech policy(ˈpäləsē) director at the Electronic(əˌlekˈtränik) Frontier(ˌfrənˈti(ə)r) Foundation, a privacy(ˈprīvəsē) advocate(ˈadvəkət).

Some providers say these tracking tools are meant(ment) to measure user reaction to app updates and other changes. Jude(jo͞odə) McColgan, chief(CHēf) executive(iɡˈzekyədiv) officer of Boston’s Localytics, says he hasn’t seen clients use the technology to target former users with ads. Ehren Maedge(māj), vice(vīs) president(ˈprezəˌdent) for marketing and sales at MoEngage Inc.(inˈkôrpəˌrātid) in San Francisco, says it’s up to the app makers not to do so. “The dialogue(ˈdīəˌläg) is between our customers and their end users,” he says. “If they violate(ˈvīəˌlāt) users’ trust, it’s not going to go well for them.” Adjust, AppsFlyer, and CleverTap didn’t respond to requests for comment(ˈkämˌent), nor did T-Mobile, Spotify, or Yelp.

…
https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2018-10-22/now-apps-can-track-you-even-after-you-uninstall-them

Barking(bärk)

By Derek Sivers

I’m in New York City. Across the street is a man pacing(pās,ˈpäˌCHā,ˈpāˌsē) on the sidewalk. He’s insanely(inˈsānlē) barking something at the top of his lungs(ləNG). Everyone is avoiding going anywhere near him.

I get closer. I try to figure out what he’s screaming about. Finally I hear it. “20% coupons(ˈk(y)o͞oˌpän) for window shades(SHād)! 20% off! Window shades! Get your coupons here!”

Yeah… uh… that’s not working.

A week later, I’m hanging(ˈhaNGiNG) with a friend in Union(ˈyo͞onyən) Square(skwe(ə)r). The whole time we’re talking, there’s some man yelling(yel) in the background. It’s almost like he’s singing a repetitive(riˈpetətiv) phrase(frāz) — always an F falling to a D. Again I’m curious(ˈkyo͝orēəs), so I get closer to hear what he’s yelling. “Help feed the homeless! Help feed the homeless!”

Ah! So he’s trying to help! But again, everyone is avoiding him.

Then it made me think: How many of us do this?

Maybe we weren’t getting the results we wanted, so we thought if we shouted(SHout) louder, more people would hear.

But people avoid those types. If someone always pitches(piCH) his business to friends at parties, he won’t get invited(inˈvīt) to parties anymore.

In England, I heard the word “barking” used as slang(slaNG) for “insane(inˈsān)”. (It’s short for “barking mad”, get it?)

When promoting, make sure you’re not barking.

When things aren’t working, be smarter, not louder.

http://www.gutenberg.org/files/219/219-h/219-h.htm

Puppy(ˈpəpē) Cuteness(ˈkyo͞otnəs) Is Perfectly Timed to Manipulate(məˈnipyəˌlāt) Humans

Dogs become most irresistible(ˌi(r)rəˈzistəb(ə)l) to people just when they need us most.

By Sarah(ˈse(ə)rə) Elizabeth(əˈlizəbəTH) Adler(ˈadlər, ˈäd-)

“All puppies are cute,” explains(ikˈsplān) Clive(klīv) Wynne, the head of Arizona(ˌarəˈzōnə) State University’s canine(ˈkāˌnīn)-science(ˈsīəns) laboratory(ˈlabrəˌtôrē). “But not all puppies are equally(ˈēkwəlē) cute.” Indeed, breeders(ˈbrēdər) have long found that puppies become their cutest selves at the eight-week mark; any older, and some breeders offer a discount to bolster(ˈbōlstər) would-be owners’ weakened desire. Such fine-tuned(t(y)o͞on) preferences(ˈpref(ə)rəns) might seem arbitrary(ˈärbiˌtrerē), even cruel(ˈkro͞oəl). But recent research indicates(ˈindəˌkāt) that peak(pēk) puppy cuteness serves important purposes—and might play a fundamental role in binding dog and owner together.

In a study published this spring, Wynne and his colleagues(ˈkälēɡ) sought to pin down, scientifically(ˌsīənˈtifik(ə)lē), the timeline of puppy cuteness. Their finding largely(ˈlärjlē) matched that of breeders: People consistently rated(rāt) dogs most attractive(əˈtraktiv) when they were six to eight weeks old. This age, Wynne says, coincides(ˈkōənˌsīd,ˌkōənˈsīd) with a crucial(ˈkro͞oSHəl) developmental milestone(ˈmīlˌstōn): Mother dogs stop nursing(ˈnərsiNG) their young around the eighth week, after which pups rely on humans for survival(sərˈvīvəl). (Puppies without human caretakers face mortality(môrˈtalətē) rates of up to 95 percent in their first year of life.) Peak(pēk) cuteness, then, is no accident(ˈaksidənt)—at exactly(igˈzak(t)lē) the moment when our intervention(ˌintərˈvenCHən) matters most, puppies become irresistible(ˌiriˈzistəbəl) to us.

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https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2018/11/survival-of-the-cutest/570799/

Pirate(ˈpīrət)
PIRATE

INT: PRINCIPAL’S(ˈprinsəpəl) OFFICE — DAY

The child, dressed(dres) as a pirate, is sitting sullenly(ˈsələn) in a chair(CHer) while the principal writes out a behavior slip at her desk.

CHILD

(angry and embarrassed(əmˈberəst), near tears(ter))

I don’t know why I’m in here. My mom said that I could wear(we(ə)r) what I want to school as long as it isn’t underwear(ˈəndərˌwer) on my head, and pirates don’t wear underwear on their head. The hook isn’t even real, so it’s not a weapon(ˈwepən). Jake(jāk) should be the one getting in trouble, because he’s the one who pushed Crissey off the play structure. I didn’t do it! I didn’t. All I said was that she had to walk the plank(plaNGk).

She should get in trouble too, because if she had walked the plank like I told her, nobody would’ve pushed her off and she wouldn’t have landed on Rob(räb). That was all her fault! She landed on him on purpose(ˈpərpəs) because she likes him and wants to kiss him and stuff. She’s always chasing(CHās) him around on the blacktop and one time she said she was going to marry him and he told her she was gross(grōs). She should be the one getting a behavior slip! She should get in trouble because she’s a liar(ˈlīər) and a tattletale(ˈtadlˌtāl) and all I wanted to do was play a fun game and she ruined(ˈro͞oin) everything.

Mrs. K said that all the world’s a stage(stāj) and we all get to be the players, so I don’t get why I can’t be a pirate. You should be allowed to be what you want, and other people should have to listen. This isn’t fair(fe(ə)r) and I don’t like it and I want my mom. I won’t apologize(əˈpäləˌjīz). I won’t. Pirates don’t ever have to say they’re sorry.

https://www.instantmonologues.com/preview/Pirate

Are Siblings(ˈsibliNG) More Important Than Parents?

How brothers and sisters shape who we are

By Ben Healy(hēlē)

We don’t choose our siblings the way we choose our partners and friends. Of course, we don’t choose our parents either, but they usually make that up to us by sustaining(səˈstān) us on the way to adulthood((əˈdəltho͝od, ˈadəltho͝od). Brothers and sisters are just sort of there. And yet, when it comes to our development, they can be more influential(ˌinflo͞oˈenCHəl) than parents. This holds whether they are older and cool, or younger and frustrating(ˈfrəsˌtrāt); whether we follow in their footsteps, or run screaming in the other direction.

Part of siblings’ sway(swā) has to do with their sheer(SHi(ə)r) presence(ˈprezəns). Eighty-two percent of kids live with a sibling (a greater share than live with a father), and about 75 percent of 70-year-olds have a living sibling. For those of us who have brothers or sisters, our relationships with them will likely be the longest of our life.

Whether these relationships make our life better or worse is a more complicated(ˈkämpləˌkātid) question. On the upside, positive interactions with siblings during adolescence(ˌadlˈesəns) foster(ˈfäs-,ˈfôstər) empathy(ˈempəTHē), prosocial(prōˈsōSHəl) behavior, and academic(ˌakəˈdemik) achievement. This effect can be complicated by a full house, however. Kids with more siblings (a larger “sibship(ˈsibSHip),” to use the industry term) do worse in school—although the universality(ˌyo͞onəvərˈsalədē) of this finding has been challenged(ˈCHalənjd) by studies of Mormons and the entire population of Norway(ˈnôrˌwā).

When a sibling relationship is bad, however, it can be really bad—as in messing(mes)-up-your-life bad. Tense(tens) sibling relationships make people more likely to use substances(ˈsəbstəns) and to be depressed(dəˈprest) and anxious(ˈaNG(k)SHəs) in adolescence(ˌadlˈesəns). Moreover, sibling bullying(ˈbo͝olē) makes a kid more likely to engage(enˈgāj) in self-harm as a teen and to become psychotic(sīˈkätik) by age 18.

…
https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2018/11/the-science-of-sibling-rivalry/570811/