The Heartbreaking Effects of Being Only Partly Committed to Most Things

By Leo Babauta

If we’re absolutely honest with ourselves, most of us are only half-committed to most things — in many cases, much less than half-committed.

We say that we’re going to change our diet(ˈdīət), but are we fully committed? Do we make a meal plan and buy the groceries(ˈgrōs(ə)rē) and clear out the junk(jəNGk) food and set time in our calendar to prep(prep) meals for the week and change our habit of eating out much of the time?

Do we feel so committed in our hearts that we’d bet(bet) our lives on it?

We make a commitment at work (to our team, client, partner) but we don’t fully show up. We get distracted(dəˈstraktəd), we procrastinate, we are only half in it much of the time. We do the same thing to the people we love — we’re only half there for them.

How often do we show up fully, with deep commitment?

This is not about blaming(blām) or shaming(SHām), not about being judgmental(ˌjəjˈmen(t)l) or criticizing(ˈkridəˌsīz) ourselves. This is about getting clear on whether we’re fully committed to anything, and getting very clear on the effects of that in our lives.

How often do we let others down, not showing up like we promised we would, not delivering like we promised we would? How often do we let ourselves down? How often do we stay on our phones when our loved ones are craving(ˈkrāviNG) our attention?

And how does it affect those around us, and ourselves, and our work in the world?

It’s heartbreaking:

We lose(lo͞oz) trust in ourselves, beat(bēt) ourselves up for failing again, create a negative self-image, which affects everything.
We form the habit of shrinking(SHriNGk) away from scary(ˈske(ə)rē) and hard things, staying in our comfort zones, playing a smaller game.
We lose the trust of others, and break their hearts when they hope we’ll be fully there for them.
We come across as flaky(ˈflākē), wishy-washy(ˈwäSHē,ˈwôSHē), late for things, untrustable, which creates a sense of not being safe, not being able to relax, in others. We feel their not being able to trust us and not being able to relax with us, and that feels hurtful in us.
We never feel the joy of showing up powerfully in the world, of being incredibly committed, of deepening(ˈdēpəniNG) into that commitment.

Again, this is nothing to feel shameful or guilty(ˈgiltē) about, or beat ourselves up about. It’s about letting our hearts be broken by how we let others down and let ourselves down, and creating a commitment to showing up fully in the world, powerfully, with full commitment.

How do we do that? It’s a practice…

…
https://zenhabits.net/the-heartbreaking-effects-of-being-only-partly-committed-to-most-things/

What if Children Ran the School Lunchroom?

A new program lets students customize(ˈkəstəˌmīz) their meals(mēl), participate in taste(tāst) tests and brainstorm ways to redesign their school cafeterias(ˌkafiˈti(ə)rēə).

By Anahad O’Connor

On a recent Tuesday, the cafeteria at KairosPDX(ˈkīräs) charter(ˈCHärdər) school in Portland(ˈpôrtlənd), Ore.(ôr), was buzzing(ˈbəziNG) as students lined up to taste two freshly(ˈfreSHlē) made butternut(ˈbədərˌnət) squash(skwäSH,skwôSH) recipes(ˈresəˌpē). On one side of the table was roasted(rōst) butternut squash. On the other side, a creamy(ˈkrēmē) butternut squash soup(so͞op).

“This one is the best,” said Mari(ˈmärē), a fifth grader(ˈgrādər), as she gulped(gəlp) soup from a small cup. “It’s super delicious. I want a big bowl(bōl) of it to eat at home.”

The students were participating in a “Tasty(ˈtāstē) Challenge” event organized by FoodCorps, a nonprofit(ˈnänˈpräfit) organization that connects children to healthy food in schools. The group recently teamed(tēm) up with Sweetgreen, the national salad(ˈsaləd) chain(CHān), to carry(ˈkarē) out a new program that aims(ām) to improve the school food experience by letting(let) students customize their meals, participate in taste tests and brainstorm ways to redesign their school cafeterias.

As part of the initiative(iˈniSH(ē)ədiv), called “Reimagining(ˌrē-iˈmajən) School Cafeterias,” the students at KairosPDX got to compare the two butternut squash recipes and then vote(vōt) on their favorite one using an iPad. The soup won in a landslide(ˈlan(d)ˌslīd), and the school is considering adding it to the cafeteria lunch menu(ˈmenyo͞o).

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https://www.nytimes.com/2020/01/03/well/eat/School-cafeteria-lunch-children-health-foodcorps-sweetgreen.html

When in doubt(dout), try the difference

By Derek Sivers

If you’re in doubt about something that’s not in your life, try it. Things are so different in practice versus in theory(ˈTHi(ə)rē,ˈTHēərē). The only way to know is to experience it yourself.

Try it examples:

Pursuing a new interest?
Moving somewhere very different?
Quitting(kwit) your job to go freelance(ˈfrēˌlans)?

Err(er,ər) on the side of yes. Try it. If it was a mistake, at least you’ll know first-hand, instead of always wondering.

…

If you’re in doubt about something that’s in your life already, get rid(rid) of it. Not just things, this goes for identities, habits, goals, relationships, technology, and anything else. Default to not having it, then see how you do without.

Get rid of it examples:

Relationships that bring you down
Goals you’re not pursuing
A career(kəˈri(ə)r) that’s plateaued(plaˈtō)

Err on the side of no. Get rid of it. Start with a clean slate(slāt), If it was a mistake, you’ll get it back with a renewed enthusiasm(enˈTHo͞ozēˌazəm).

(The common thread(THred) is to make the change, to know first-hand.)

Get rid of everything examples:

Erase(əˈrās) your phone and computer. Re-install the operating system from scratch(skraCH). Don’t restore from the backup — not even your contacts. Only add back people who contact you. Don’t install any apps unless you can’t do without them.

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https://sivers.org/trd

Would everyone please stop complaining about the cold and snow?

By Roma(ˈrōmə) Ihnatowycz

I spent most of my teenage(ˈtēnˌāj) years despising(dəˈspīz) winter, viewing it as an aberration(ˌabəˈrāSHən), a gross(grōs) miscalculation(ˌmisˌkalkyəˈlāSHən) by the weather gods when they were fashioning the calendar(ˈkaləndər) year. They must have had an off-day, I thought. Or, as it happens, an off-season.

It’s not a surprising sentiment(ˈsen(t)əmənt) for someone who spent most of her youthful winters in Toronto on the brink(briNGk) of hypothermia(ˌhīpəˈTHərmēə). Even in subzero temperatures(-ˌCHo͝or,ˈtemp(ə)rəCHər), my outdoor attire(əˈtī(ə)r) was little more than a thin(THin) ski(skē) jacket(ˈjakət) and flimsy(ˈflimzē) leather(ˈleT͟Hər) boots. Between the two were knee(nē) socks and a very short uniform(ˈyo͞onəˌfôrm) kilt(kilt). I survived(sərˈvīv) winter virtually(ˈvərCHə(wə)lē) bare-legged(ˈleɡ(ə)d) and spent months cursing(kərs) the cold while speed-walking home and praying(prā) desperately(ˈdesp(ə)rətlē) for the first signs of spring. Sound familiar?

Then I moved to even colder Montreal(ˌmäntrēˈôl) for university and was spellbound(ˈspelbīnd) at the gusto(ˈgəstō) with which the locals embraced(emˈbrās) my least(lēst) favourite season. On frigid(ˈfrijid) January(ˈjanyo͞oˌerē) weekends, they gathered on Mont Royal(ˈroiəl), families in tow, for an afternoon walk. “What on earth?!” I thought. At the Winter Carnival(ˈkärnəvəl) in Quebec(kəˈbek, kwəˈbek) City, I stumbled(ˈstəmbəl) upon an outdoor play – an outdoor play! And it was a full house, with people sitting on snow-covered benches(benCH) intently(inˈtentlē) watching, children included. Stranger yet, they looked happy. Years later, it’s no surprise Quebec opened the continent’s(ˈkäntnənt) first, and only, Ice Hotel.

But the Quebeckers I encountered were bundled up warmly in hats(hat), scarves(skärvz) and proper winter boots – there wasn’t a thin jacket in sight(sīt). In other words, they were warm. I wasn’t. Time to go shopping.

And just like that, I discovered how tolerable(ˈtälərəbəl) winter could be when you’re dressed for it. For the first time in my life, it was winter and I wasn’t covered in goosebumps(ˈɡo͞osˌbəmps). It was a revelation(ˌrevəˈlāSHən). My walking slowed down, I noticed the views and I was no longer consumed with the thought of reaching the great indoors, counting the minutes it would take to get me there.

…
https://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/first-person/article-would-everyone-please-stop-complaining-about-the-cold-and-snow/

Are Nike’s(ˈnīkē) Vaporfly(ˈvāpər) Running Shoes Too Good?

By Eben(e) Novy-Williams(ˈwilyəmz)

The sneaker(ˈsnēkər) may have helped break the two-hour marathon(ˈmarəˌTHän) barrier(ˈbarēər), but it could also bring additional scrutiny(ˈskro͞otn-ē) from the IAAF.

Last month, elite(āˈlēt,əˈlēt) marathoner Eliud(əlīy) Kipchoge ran 26.2 miles(mīl) in less than two hours, breaking a barrier some thought impossible. The following day, fellow Kenyan(ˈkēnyən, ˈkenyən) Brigid Kosgei shattered(ˈSHadərd) the women’s marathon record(ˈrekərd). The common thread for both performances: the shoes on their feet. Kipchoge was running in a prototype(ˈprōdəˌtīp) featuring Nike Inc.’s(inˈkôrpəˌrādəd) latest Vaporfly technology. Kosgei was wearing an earlier version of the same shoe, which retails(ˈrēˌtāl) for $250.

Their runs reignited(ˌrē-igˈnīt) a debate(dəˈbāt) that’s simmered(ˈsimər) since Nike unveiled(ˌənˈvāl) this class of shoes in 2017. The sneakers have a carbon(ˈkärbən) fiber(ˈfībər) plate(plāt), lightweight(ˈlītˌwāt) foam(fōm), and a stiff(stif) forefoot(ˈfôrˌfo͝ot) that rocks you forward. Nike says they’re proven to decrease(dəˈkrēs) effort by at least 4%, helping you run faster on the road and recover quicker afterward. “Out of the box, you are 4% better,” says Matt Nurse(nərs), vice(vīs,ˈvīsē,ˈvīsə) president(ˈprez(ə)dənt,ˈprezəˌdent) of the Nike Explore(ikˈsplôr) Team Sport Research Lab. “No question. We tested that across ranges of speed and ability.”

Now, as other sneaker companies race(rās) to produce high-end shoes with similar benefits, critics(ˈkridik) worry that Nike has tipped(tip) distance running’s competitive(kəmˈpedədiv) balance on the eve(ēv) of the Summer Olympics in Tokyo. The sport’s governing(ˈgəvərn) body is exploring whether to rein(rān) in athletic goods companies or let them run wild, a decision that could usher(ˈəSHər) in an arms race(rās) for high-tech sneakers. “This is not a little advancement(ədˈvansmənt) in technology, this is a completely different animal,” says Ryan(ˈrīən) Hall, a retired(rəˈtī(ə)rd) U.S. distance runner. “Physically(ˈfizik(ə)lē) speaking, it’s so hard for elite(āˈlēt,əˈlēt) runners to take one minute off their marathon time. To just put on a pair of shoes and be able to run two minutes quicker, that’s mind-blowing(blō).”

…
https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2019-11-14/nike-s-vaporfly-tests-the-boundaries-of-the-running-shoe

The Lens(lenz) of Story

By Steve Pavlina

A powerful lens you can use for making sense(sens) of life is the lens of story.

What’s especially powerful about story is that it beautifully integrates(ˈin(t)əˌɡrāt) the objective and subjective lenses. There’s the objective side of a story, such as the settings, characters, and events. And there’s the subjective side, meaning your thoughts, feelings, and inner journey(ˈjərnē).

How could you apply the lens of story to help you make sense of complicated(ˈkämpləˌkādəd) situations or decisions?

Here are some good questions to ask:

How does this fit my overall story?
Where does my story want to go next?
Which decision would make for interesting story? Boring story?

Imagine your life is one big story. Your story has a certain progression(prəˈgreSHən) to it. Some next steps make sense because they fit your story. Other steps don’t make much sense because they don’t fit your story.

If you view your life thus far through the lens of story, as if you’d been reading it in a novel(ˈnävəl), what observations could you make about the overall story arc(ärk) thus far?

When I look at my life through the lens of story, I can pick out certain progressions. There are patterns.

I see a pattern in my story where I’m often tempted to pursue a heartless path that might dangle(ˈdaNGgəl) some other carrots(ˈkarət) in front of me like success or fame(fām) or money. If I chase(CHās) after those carrots, my character suffers because it never turns out well. Each time my character must recognize the trap and find a path with a heart instead. Then when he follows a path that feels strongly heart aligned(əˈlīn), things work out very well both subjectively and objectively.

Another part of my story has involved learning to trust my own decisions even when they go against(əˈgenst,əˈgānst) the grain(grān) of society… and then watching society slowly alter(ˈôltər) course(kôrs) to validate(ˈvaləˌdāt) the decision.

And yet another part of my story has involved lightening up and learning to play. Tackle(ˈtakəl) serious challenges, but still make the journey fun.

I encourage you to look for similar patterns in your own story arc. What were some of your most memorable(ˈmem(ə)rəbəl) experiences? How did they shape your character? How do you believe your story has shaped you? What kind of character are you playing now?

…
https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2020/01/the-lens-of-story/

You’re My Home

By Billy(ˈbilē) Joel(jō(ə)l)

When you look into my eyes
And you see the crazy gypsy(ˈjipsē) in my soul
It always comes as a surprise
When I feel my withered(ˈwiT͟Hərd) roots begin to grow
Well I never had a place
That I could call my very own
That’s all right my love
Cause you’re my home
When you touch my weary(ˈwirē) head
And you tell me everything will be all right
You say “Use my body for your bed
And my love will keep you
Warm throughout the night”
Well I’ll(īl) never be a stranger and I’ll never be alone
Whenever we’re together
That’s my home
Home can be the Pennsylvania(ˌpensəlˈvānyə) Turnpike(ˈtərnˌpīk)
Indiana’s(ˌindēˈanə) early morning dew(d(y)o͞o)
High up in the hills(hil) of California
Home is just another word for you
Well I never had a place
That I could call my very own
That’s all right my love
‘Cause you’re my home
If I travel all my life
And I never get to stop and settle(ˈsedl) down

Long as I have you by my side
There’s a roof above and good walls all around
You’re my castle(ˈkasəl) you’re my cabin(ˈkabən)
And my instant pleasure(ˈpleZHər) dome(dōm)
I need you in my house
‘Cause you’re my home
You’re my home

https://y.qq.com/n/yqq/song/000WJ3E21o5sjR.html

3D Movies

By 王渊源John

I love going to the movies. And I’ve really enjoyed some 3D movies. But I hate(hāt) that so many movies seem to be only available in 3D in theaters(ˈTHēədər).

What I love about going to the movies is the experience of watching a movie with a large group of friends and strangers. The laughter at the funniest moments makes them even funnier; the silent attention in dramatic(drəˈmadik) moments makes them feel more impactful. Ok, and also the popcorn(ˈpäpˌkôrn), but they only have sweet popcorn at theaters in Beijing, which doesn’t really do it for me.

The 3D movies I have enjoyed have mostly been crazy action movies with things flying out of the screen. Sometimes, movies like that feel more immersive(iˈmərsiv) with 3D. For most movies, though, the 3D effects feel like a novelty(ˈnävəltē), and I find it to be distracting rather than making the movie feel more immersive.

Maybe I’m not looking hard enough, but, at least in Beijing, it seems to be hard to find non-3D options for movies that are available in 3D. So while I can still go to the theater for the experience, I can’t really avoid the distraction of 3D.

I suppose I’m on the wrong side of the market with this. People must want 3D, and be willing to pay more, or else theaters would offer non-3D versions. I guess my best option is to set up a theater at home and invite(inˈvīt) friends.

http://en.yjohny.com/2019/09/03/3d-movies/

A Guide to Dealing with Uncertainty(ˌənˈsərtn(t)ē) About What Path to Take

By Leo Babauta

The amount of time we spend fretting(fret) over what path to take, when we’re feeling uncertain, can sometimes be staggering(ˈstagər).

We’re entering(ˈentər) into unknown territory(ˈterəˌtôrē), and we don’t know how to proceed(prō-,prəˈsēd). It happens all the time for many of us: we start a new job, launch a new venture(ˈvenCHər), change careers, have to deal with incredible change, decide to write a book or create something online, put ourselves in a new social situation.

Some of the things we do in response to this uncertainty:

Extensive research, often to the point of very diminishing(dəˈminiSH) returns, sometimes to the point of being overwhelmed by how much information we’ve found.
Buy books, courses(kôrs), programs, other materials(məˈti(ə)rēəl) that we think will guide us — this isn’t necessarily a bad idea, but in truth, none of this will give us certainty.
Try to find teachers or other people who will guide us, who have been there before — again, hoping that they’ll give us certainty, but often this isn’t a magic pill(pil) either.
Delay(dəˈlā) making a decision, putting it off over and over because it’s too hard to decide. Avoid, avoid. This might be the most common option, actually.
Give up because you don’t know if you can do it, don’t know what to do, don’t know what the hell(hel) you’re doing. This is pretty common too — in fact, most people give up before they even start.

These are very common reactions to entering into uncertainty, but usually not very helpful. They get in the way of doing the work and living the life we’d like.

So how do we deal with the uncertain path that we’d like to embark(emˈbärk) upon?

…
https://zenhabits.net/uncertainty-guide/

Review of “My Neighbor(ˈnābər) Totoro”

By Roger Ebert

Here is a children’s film made for the world we should live in, rather than the one we occupy(ˈäkyəˌpī). A film with no villains(ˈvilən). No fight(fīt) scenes(sēn). No evil(ˈēvəl) adults. No fighting between the two kids. No scary(ˈske(ə)rē) monsters. No darkness before the dawn(dän,dôn). A world that is benign(bəˈnīn). A world where if you meet a strange towering creature in the forest, you curl(kərl) up on its tummy(ˈtəmē) and have a nap(nap).

‘’My Neighbor Totoro’’ has become one of the most beloved(bəˈləv(ə)d) of all family films without ever having been much promoted(prəˈmōt) or advertised(ˈadvərˌtīz). It’s a perennial(pəˈrenēəl) best seller on video. On the Internet Movie Database, it’s voted the fifth best family film of all time, right behind ‘’Toy Story 2’’ and ahead of ‘’Shrek.’’ The new Anime(ˈanəˌmā) Encyclopedia(enˌsīkləˈpēdēə) calls it the best Japanese animated film ever made. Whenever I watch it, I smile, and smile, and smile.

This is one of the lovingly hand-crafted works of Hayao Miyazaki, often called the greatest of the Japanese animators(ˈanimādər), although his colleague at the Ghibli Studios, Isao(ē) Takahata, may be his equal. Remarkable that ‘’Totoro’’ and Takahata’s ‘’Grave(grāv,ˈgräˌvā) of the Fireflies,’’ now both in my Great Movies selection, were released on the same double bill in 1988. Miyazaki has not until very recently used computers to help animate his films; they are drawn(drôn) a frame(frām) at a time, the classic way, with the master himself contributing tens of thousands of the frames.

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https://www.rogerebert.com/reviews/great-movie-my-neighbor-totoro-1993