PSA: Black Friday is terrible

PSA: Black Friday(ˈfrīdā) is terrible

By Anne(an) T. Donahue(ˈdänəˌhyo͞o)

I don’t remember the first Black Friday I worked during my 10 years in retail(ˈrēˌtāl), but I remember at one point fighting(ˈfīdiNG) the urge(ərj) to drop to my knees(nē) like Willem Dafoe in Platoon(pləˈto͞on), and screaming(skrēm) into a pile(pīl) of polos(ˈpōlō).

This was shocking(ˈSHäkiNG) because I love the mall(môl). I love going to the mall now, and I loved working at the mall until it was time to leave my job and start writing full-time. I grew up going to the mall with my grandparents, and thanks to Nana’s(ˈnanə) gift for bartering(ˈbärtər) and the comfort I took in knowing Grandpa would meet his friends at Mmmuffins(ˈməfən) every week, I learned that the mall was a good place. A space full of snacks(snak) and bargains(ˈbärgən) and fountains(ˈfountn) to sit in front of. Which is probably(ˈpräbəblē) why I don’t even hate(hāt) Boxing Day.

But Black Friday is different. The late-November day is my nemesis(ˈneməsis). It morphs(môrf) all of us into panicked(ˈpanik) consumers, obsessed(əbˈses) with trying to make each Christmas perfect by accumulating(əˈkyo͞omyəˌlāt) the latest and greatest things.

Which isn’t the customers’ fault. How can it be, when holiday commercials(kəˈmərSHəl) begin airing(ˈe(ə)riNG) in October, and Black Friday is trumpeted(ˈtrəmpət) as the only chance to acquire(əˈkwī(ə)r) enough stuff to make your friends and family happy? As temperatures(ˈtemp(ə)rəCHər) drop, the pressure(ˈpreSHər) gets higher to make this year the Best One Ever (TM), so by the time Black Friday arrives(əˈrīv), the tension(ˈtenSHən) is palpable(ˈpalpəbəl) and the mission(ˈmiSHən) is clear: Buy everything now or reconcile(ˈrekənˌsīl) with being the worst. And I hate(hāt) that because it’s grossly(ˈɡrōslē) unfair(ˌənˈfe(ə)r).

It takes money to buy Christmas presents(priˈzent,ˈprezənt), and it takes even more money to buy the kind of gifts we’re told everybody’s supposed to have. I, like most people I know (and most people on the planet(ˈplanit)), didn’t grow up with the kind of money needed to make those kinds of Christmas dreams come true. And even as a kid, I understood that: My parents were trying their best, and that was enough. Also, if I complained(kəmˈplān) about not getting as much as another kid in my class, my parents were quick to remind(riˈmīnd) me that maybe I didn’t need any Christmas gifts at all. (So I shut up immediately(iˈmēdēətlē).)

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https://www.theglobeandmail.com/opinion/article-psa-black-friday-is-terrible/