How to Break Up With Your Phone

How to Break Up With Your Phone

By Catherine Price(prīs)

The moment I realized(ˈrē(ə)ˌlīz) I needed to break up with my phone came just over two years ago. I had recently had a baby and was feeding her in a darkened(ˈdärkən) room as she cuddled(ˈkədl) on my lap(lap). It was an intimate(ˈintəmit,ˈintəˌmāt), tender(ˈtendər) moment — except for one detail. She was gazing(gāz) at me … and I was on eBay, scrolling(ˈskrōliNG) through listings for Victorian(vikˈtôrēən)-era(ˈerə,ˈi(ə)rə) doorknobs(ˈdôrˌnäb).

I’m not going to try to explain(ikˈsplān) this particular personal passion(ˈpaSHən). The point is that a good 15 minutes had probably passed before I finally caught sight of my daughter looking at me, her tiny(ˈtīnē) face illuminated(iˈlo͞oməˌnāt) by my phone’s blue light. I saw the scene(sēn) as it would have looked to an outsider — her focused on me, me focused on my phone — and my heart sank. This was not the way I wanted things to be.

An increasing(ē) number of us are coming to realize that our relationships with our phones are not exactly what a couples therapist(ˈTHerəpist) would describe as “healthy.” According to data from Moment, a time-tracking(ˈtrakiNG) app with nearly five million users, the average(ˈav(ə)rij) person spends four hours a day interacting(ˌintərˈakt) with his or her phone.

I still wanted to use my phone when it was helpful or fun. But I wanted a new relationship with it — one with better boundaries(ˈbound(ə)rē), and over which I had more control. I spent the next year and a half researching habits, addiction(əˈdikSHən), behavior change, mindfulness and neuroplasticity(plaˈstisitē), and developed a comprehensive(ˌkämpriˈhensiv) strategy(ˈstratəjē) for how to “break up” with my phone. The goal(gōl) wasn’t to never use my phone again; it was to create a sustainable(səˈstānəbəl) relationship that felt healthy.

Two years later, I feel that I’ve succeeded. Here are some of the key things I learned on how to navigate(ˈnaviˌgāt) a successful breakup and create a better relationship with your phone.

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https://www.nytimes.com/2018/02/13/well/phone-cellphone-addiction-time.html