How to Be a Modern Parent

How to Be a Modern Parent

By Perri(pai rui) Klass, M.D. and Lisa Damour（da mer）

We all want to be the best parents we can be, for our children, but there is often conflicting advice, on how to raise a kid who is confident, kind and successful. Throughout the circus act of parenting, it’s important to focus on balancing priorities, juggling responsibilities, and quickly flipping between the needs of your children, other family members, and yourself. Modern parents have the entire(in ter) internet at their disposal（disˈpōzəl）, and don’t follow any single authority(əˈTHôritē). It’s hard to know whom, or what to trust(trəst). Here, we’ll talk about how to help your child grow up to be a person you really like, without losing yourself in the process.

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Good news: There is no one right way, to raise a child.

Research tells us, that to raise a self-reliant child, with high self-esteem, it is more effective(iˈfektiv), to be authoritative(əˈTHôriˌtātiv), than authoritarian(əˌTHôriˈte(ə)rēən). You want your child to listen, respect, and trust you rather than fear(fi(ə)r) you. You want to be supportive(səˈpôrtiv), but not a hovering(ˈhəvər), helicopter(ˈheliˌkäptər) parent.

All of these things, are easy to set as goals(gōls), but hard to achieve. How do you find the right balance?

As your child develops, the challenges will change, and your thinking, may evolve(iˈvälv), but your approach(əˈprōCH), should be consistent, firm(fərm), and loving. Help your child learn through experience(ikˈspi(ə)rēəns), that making an effort(ˈefərt), builds confidence, and helps you learn to tackle(ˈtakəl) challenges(ˈCHalənj). Calibrate(ˈkaləˌbrāt) your expectations about what your child is capable(ˈkāpəbəl) of doing independently, whether you have an infant(ˈinfənt) learning to sleep through the night, a toddler(ˈtädlər), helping to put toys(toi s) away, or an older child, resolving conflicts.

Remember, there is no one right way, to raise a child. Do your best, trust yourself, and enjoy the company, of the small person, in your life.